Forgiveness

12/5/2017

Look into the past Forgivingly, Look to the future hopefully; but, above all, be in the present. 

Forgiveness:

Your soul and mind will be calmer when you forgive someone of their transgression against you. Some offenses against you are intentional, others are not. Some result from carelessness on the part of the offender. Some result from yourself not being careful enough around some people. Regardless of the circumstances, the pain is no less painful. It is acceptable to feel anger for a short time. It validates you and the hurt you feel. But, you must try to forgive after a short time. Grieving a loss or healing a wound is a necessary part of life, but hanging onto bitterness will keep you from healing mentally.

 Learn from the experience and use that wisdom to guide your decisions next time. Confront those who hurt you and tell them how they hurt you. Tell them to stop. Teach them how to prevent it from happening again. If they don’t listen, avoid situations that caused the pain the first time. Stay away from some people who are repeatedly careless. You are not required to let those who hurt you into your inner friendship circle to see your vulnerabilities. However, you must be able to forgive and move on. 

Throughout life, you will see these people again. You must put past offenses aside so you can work with them constructively. Sometimes argument and strife can bring people closer; sometimes it separates them. However, forgiveness must be universal.

Through forgiveness, you gain wisdom. Wisdom can include knowledge of personality differences. It can include knowledge of how people think under stress. It can include how to talk problems out with other people so you can problem solve with them. You gain social skills when you allow for forgiveness and careful thought.

Frustration:

Frustration comes not from negativity, but from unrealistic optimism. People sometimes think everything will go exactly as planned and when things don’t go as planned, people get frustrated. It is because they didn’t come up with an alternate plan if things go wrong. You must make accommodation for the messy processes of life. Not everything will go smoothly and you must be resourceful, have patience and have an alternate plan. If you have time, be patient with others. If you don’t have time, decide what is most important to accomplish and do only that. Make a plan to complete the rest of the tasks later. Attempt your mission next time with more resources. Have back-up items in case something gets lost.

Be Prepared:

Mothers, teachers and army generals know the value of being prepared for the situation they are going into. The Girl Scout motto is “Be Prepared.” Luck favors the prepared. Envision what you would like out of a social occasion or a trip to another place and have what you will need in case events should go favorably for you.

Also, be prepared for a worst-case scenario. If you think a social occasion might not go well, take a book, bring a game or learn some jokes to tell.  If you travel, take cold medicine, stomach medicine, good shoes, a coat, food and water. 

See the world with a positive lens:

During adversity, it is easy to see the world as a dark place. However, when there is doubt, go with the positive interpretation of events. You may never know exactly what caused something to happen. But, if you try to see the best in people or try to keep your faith with God, your soul and mind will be healthier.

Sometimes people won’t help you because they can’t. Sometimes they won’t help you because they are testing to see how strong you are. Sometimes people really don’t care about your problems. Regardless of the reason, you will emerge stronger than they when your time of adversity is over.